March 26th, 2017

As I lay in bed right now and contemplate life…. I wonder who is genuinely happy. Not because someone says they are or because they have lots or money. But who is genuinely happy?! Who can say man I have everything. This is enough for me. Im happy?! Happiness you see…  Is an inside job and thats the problem nowadays everyone is searching for someone else to make them happy instead or doing it themselves.. If you aren’t happy with yourself. You’ll never be happy with anyone else… And you can’t force someone to be happy either. You can’t make someone be happy. You want make someone appreciate life or value it. If they just don’t care! Honestly. That is the problem in relationships. The only thing you can do honestly is try not to let anyone TAKE your joy. If you have it keep it. You have such a rare and precious treasure if you are happy. Don’t let anyone take it from you. Don’t let someone tell you, you can’t be happy from something even if they don’t get it. Its not for them to understand and that’s where people go wrong. Someone else can share their joy with you. But you cannot take it. I mean think about it, how often have you been happy about something. Excited and just overjoyed and someone ruined it because if whatever reason?! You know the saying misery loves company. But you have to be stronger and rise above. Be better. 

I don’t know. I feel like people dont get it sometimes. If you are always the happy girl and person you don’t get to be down or want time to yourself. Because everyone else expects you to be that For them. I don’t know. I’ll never understand it. 

But moving on, today I went to a winery. Lovely setting except those back roads and me dont get along haha I was definitely gonna hurl in the backseat. But I kept it together. Head out the window like an excited dog going for a ride. Was how I did it!! Me and backseat don’t mix. Lol But the winery was nice. Sample wines. Beautiful scenery. Good company. Great conversation. And the best part you ask?! No cell service. !!!!!! Anyone who knows me. Knows I hate talking on the phone with a passion. And here lately it’s gotten worse. I deactivated my facebook. Deleted my Snapchat. And here soon will prolly deactivate my IG. I just feel so disconnected from the world And my son being on that. I mean seriously. How many people can say when they are on social media it’s for something good? Most the time were just being nosy. Like ooooo I cant believe she wore that. They went out. Oh look who’s back together that kind if shit and it’s petty. If you are living your life to the fullest you shouldnt have time to worry about others and their life. 

Anywho. Its way past my bedtime. Its spring break for the kiddos. And this mama is tired. My homework tonight was a long one. 📖🎓📚✏ Welp good night 😴😴love ❤❤ peace ✌✌ happiness 😀😀 

From the very tired and sore bed if a wandering gypsy soul. 🌞🌞

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